Jeffrey Donaldson pushed back today against widespread criticism of his attempts to ‘double job’. The MP for Lagan Valley intends to keep his role as an MP while also standing for election as an MLA at the Stormont Assembly.
Many opponents have come out across the political spectrum to condemn the DUP proposal, which had previously been outlawed in 2016.
UUP Leader Doug Beattie claimed there was corruption at play saying “There’s corruption at play”. His criticism continued saying “Man, most days I get up around noon, smoke some grass, listen to some Hendrix or Cypress Hill and make it to Stormont for about 3pm. How is Jeffrey going to make it to Stormont and Westminister on the same day? That ese is loco, man.”
The controversy has been described by DUP sources as ‘fake outrage’. An internal DUP party memo which was leaked to media in N. Ireland – seemingly from Arlene Foster’s official DUP mail address – stated that “all members should take the approach that all the other parties are just ‘a bunch of gurny jealous f**ckers’. This is our official line and there should be no deviation from this.”
Boris Johnson has been dragged into the furore and the Alliance Party has described it as an attempt by the Conservative government to ‘prop up’ the DUP. A Conservative Party spokesperson in response said ‘D’uh, yeah, and what? Anything to take the heat off Boris.”
When asked for a comment on his intention to double-job, Jeffrey Donaldson referenced the current economic climate.
“I think we can all agree it’s been a difficult year for all of us – mentally, financially, politically and socially. All of us gig workers have been particularly badly hit. For the last 12 years I’ve been working as a Daniel O’Donnell lookalike and tribute act. Since Daniel stopped working due to covid, I was absolutely raking in the work. Swimming in £20 notes so I was.
Now that Daniel is back on the road the gigs have really dried up for me. I don’t think anybody realises that MPs are being asked to survive on a meagre £81,000 plus food, electricity, accommodation and travel expenses. It’s deplorable in this day and age.”
“Since Furlough has ended all of us in the artistic industries have been left to fend for ourselves and taking the second job at Stormont will simply help me top up my income.”
“Let me make a point. One of my constituents, Sharon, currently works a 40 hour week cleaning offices across Northern Ireland. Her mileage allowance is pathetic. So 3 evenings a week and 1 afternoon every weekend she does a shift at Tesco. I don’t hear the SDLP, UUP or Sinn Fein/IRA shouting about Sharon double jobbing. It’s just total hypocrisy.”
When this response about Sharon was put to Sinn Fein leader in Northern Ireland, Michelle O’Neill, she was unimpressed.
“Jaysus sh*te, you think they can’t get any dumber. Sharon is likely to be on minimum wage, with increased fuel and food bills making it impossible for her to survive without a second job. Jeffrey wants 2 jobs in 2 different countries just because none of the other DUP numpties in Lagan Valley have a chance of being elected”.
The issue appears likely to rumble on with Jeffrey Donaldson and the DUP adamant that they will proceed with their plans.
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